Julie Shares Her Thoughts on What it’s Really Like to Write a Book
You may or may not have heard about a certain best-selling book that our founder, Julie Sabatino, has written and released last month. Dressed, Styled and Down The Aisle: Becoming a Stylish Bride is the culmination of 20+ years of working with brides and the ultimate guide on putting together your own wedding fashion story.
Here, she sits down with us to share her insights into the writing process, from what she found the most challenging, to parts of the book she’s most excited to share with you. Pull up a seat, and let’s dive right in!
Firstly, what motivated you to write a book?
It’s been my career goal and mission for 20+ years to help women feel amazing on their wedding day. It’s the core of what we do here at The Stylish Bride. We’ve accumulated specific knowledge in this area that I want to share with other women around the world. I was approached by a publisher many years ago when my business was new, and it’s been in the back of my mind since. As the business continued to grow, I decided it was finally time to share the knowledge!
How did you start writing the book?
My husband, Mike and I, go on walks together every morning, and we have many conversations that help me gain clarity in every aspect of my life. He’s always been my sounding board and at one point a few years ago, he said, “Look, you have been talking about this for a long time, you need to either do it or not.” And said, “You know what, I think you’re right. I think that I should do it!” That was the trigger for me to get started, but the tricky part for me was that I actually hate to write! I think it’s partly because I have so much information that I struggle to know where to begin, but I’m also a bit dyslexic and struggle with spelling. Writing is challenging for me, and I’ve always felt like I didn’t excel at it.
The pieces started to fall into place when I reconnected with Brenda de la Casa, who was my ghostwriter. She is also a friend, long-time colleague and an incredibly talented writer. She had written an article for Pop Sugar magazine about me, and it was really well done. I asked her if she would ever be interested in working on a book, and when she said yes, that kicked off the processand made it real.
What was the most challenging thing about writing it?
The most challenging part was ensuring that what I wrote wouldn’t be misconstrued. All of the information and perspectives included are well-intentioned, but it’s incredibly anxiety-provoking to give guidance and actionable advice, because everyone is different. . I found myself prefacing most of what I wrote to ensure it would not be taken the wrong way.
What was the most fun chapter to write?
I loved writing Chapter 1 that includes a wedding fashion timeline for brides to follow. We follow this timeline with each of our clients to ensure that we stay on track and nothing gets lost in the shuffle. This isn’t common knowledge to most people, and there is no information on this topic available to brides, other than buying the wedding dress nine months prior to the wedding. My goal was to ensure that the book not only reflects the structure of the process but also gives people a clear timeline to follow.
I am also so proud of the book portal on our website where you can download additional guides and resources that coordinate with the chapters,, and my favorite is the Wedding Fashion Fillable Timeline. For example, if you know your wedding date is June 1st, you can back into it from there, and it will tell you when you need to start searching for your bridesmaids dresses, mother of the bride dress, shoes, etc. I want to take the stress away from brides as much as possible!
What was the most difficult part to write?
The hardest part to write, which I’m also the most passionate about, is the issue with bridal sizing. I wrote an entire chapter on sizing, and I try to explain why bridal dresses run so small, why the samples don’t fit 95% of women and prepare readers for what they’re going to face when they go into a store. My sentiment is that if you are aware of it and prepared for it, you can overcome it, which is also the reason I invented the Sample Size Solution: so that brides can take it with them to try dresses on and allow them to see how the dress will actually look on them, rather than just imagining it. While I’ve spoken with so many women who have had terrible experiences shopping for their own wedding dresses, because the dresses don’t fit. The reason that this chapter was hard for me to write is because I was also coming at it from my own perspective and experience.
Several months after I thought the chapter was done, I was in Puglia with Marcy Blum and her team and one of her planners brought up this issue. She happens to be petite and said to me: “No one ever talks about the problems that petite women have with regular sizing. They assume that as you get bigger you also get taller, which is far from the case. I end up having to alter the whole dress so that the waist and bust are in the right spot, and then of course, I have to shorten the hem. .?” So, I went back and rewrote this chapter, ensuring that I included a section on petite brides.
My goal for this chapter is to be inclusive, welcoming and empowering for all women and it really doesn’t matter what size you are. The bottom line is that a vast majority of women fall outside the wedding dress sample size and it’s intended to help them.
Can you give us an insight into the Bridal Style Blueprint?
One of the chapters that I’m the most excited about is Chapter 2, The Bridal Style Blueprint! It’s a process I developed by reviewing all of the consultations I’ve done over the years with our clients and honing in on the questions I had asked them that had proved the most valuable. I then put these questions together to create an insightful questionnaire to provide readers with their own style summaries to give to the consultants at their appointments. . The gist of it: you answer six questions and the answers to these can help the consultant at the bridal salon to better understand you and your style. It’s a download that you can print off and fill in yourself that’s so much more useful than the consultant just asking you questions. This is the exact summary I give to the stores prior to shopping with each of my clients.
Who did you work with for the fashion illustrations in the book?
One of the most exciting things for me during this process was working with a fashion illustrator, Hwi. I have always adored fashion illustrations, and I love how personal they help make the book feel. Working with Hwi was such a pleasure! I hope readers enjoy her work throughout the book as much as I do.
How did you feel when Dressed, Styled, and Down the Aisle was published and became a bestseller?
I actually can’t believe it! I never really thought this day would come. I have to be honest: when I was writing it, I didn’t know if anybody would read it or be interested at all. It was so incredibly well received before it was even out, and to everybody out there who pre-ordered it and has supported me along the way, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
When readers look at the beautiful photos in the book, what would you want them to see?
I wanted my book to showcase real brides and situations, not only the picture-perfect portrayals we often see.. It can be tough to balance the inspiration from all the beautiful weddings I work on, with the reality that brides face. That’s why I delve into the impact of social media and information overload. As someone constantly surrounded by weddings, and seeing my own teenage daughter scroll through Instagram, I know how social media can make you feel inadequate. My goal is to empower brides to find inspiration within themselves and prioritize discovering what truly makes them look and feel their best. External sources can be helpful, but they should come after self-discovery, not replace it.
If you had to select one topic from the book that you are most passionate about, what would it be?
I’m not entirely sure how to narrow it down. I do think that teaching women how to navigate the sizing issue is something that I’m really proud of, and sharing knowledge about what brides are going to face and how to deal with it. The book is written in a way where it doesn’t have to be a sit-down and read. You flip to the section you want to learn about, then go to the book portal to find the corresponding resource to discover what your next steps are.
Another one of my favorite parts of the book is where I feature some of the mothers of the bride and groom we have worked with over the years. . It can be really hard for them to find something that they feel good in, and it’s been a true honor to help them find items they love and feel their best wearing.
When did you know the book was done?
Brian, our publishing project manager said to me “Look, the book is never going to be done. You have to get it to a point where it’s pretty close. And there are going to be errors, and parts you want to change in the second edition, but just get 99% there.” I’m a perfectionist, so that was hard for me – I don’t want to put something out into the world that isn’t perfect. So I said, “OK, I just have to put it to bed.”
Is there anything that you want to say to your readers or future readers?
The number one piece of advice that I want readers to take away is that they are perfect exactly as they are today. There’s nothing wrong with trying to become the best version of yourself, but it’s very easy to get swept up in ideals of perfection during the wedding planning journey. At the end of the day, this is about the marriage, the partnership and the love you share together. Everything else is icing on the cake.
You can buy Dressed, Styled and Down The Aisle on Amazon and Barnes & Noble now.
